doreyt

5:00 p.m. - I got home from work and planned on going to the Y to do a powerflex class but the weather is awful and they say it’s only going to get worse.  It’s raining, lighting, thundering and there are tornado watches in the area…the old me would of just said…don’t go and not think of it twice…the new me is thinking is it really all that bad. I have been looking forward to going all day long. I’ll just have to wait 15 mins to see what is going on with the weather. If it’s still raining and awful I’ll wait longer and maybe I’ll just go and do some walking at the Y later. I cannot believe that I am actually disappointed not to go…normally I’m making up excuses why I can’t go…maybe I am slowly changing for the better.

11:50 p.m. - It eventually stopped raining and I got my body in gear and went to the Y. It was good, even though I didn’t make it to the powerflex class. I walked 2 miles.  I didn’t have an appointment to train with my trainer but I did see her. Yesterday we took measurements after only a month of my training with her. She had a copy of my measurements/weight when I first started and now. It’s all good…I went down in weight 13 lbs. and I lost inches all over. I guess what I’m doing is working. Last week was awful for me…this week seems to be much better even with my walking. I can walk faster with more of an incline. Last week I was just struggling to walk.

Tonight I’m happy and at peace with myself.

I went the Y tonight and trained with my trainer it was good. My body is feeling it now. Doing better then the first post, more positive today and hopeful. I was getting obsessed with calories, carbs and exericse last week and driving my self crazy. I was feeling like I wasn’t doing enough and the weight wasn’t coming off fast enough. I am feeling more at peace with myself today and even a little bit happy. I need to be proud of what I’ve accomplished so far and know in my heart that it will only get better each day I work at it. I’m trying not to judge myself so harshly…and let the little girl inside of me come out and play, exercise and have fun. 

I just signed up today for this site. I need some friends and support. This year is the year I decided to get healthy - 2008. Mind you, I have said that in the past and it didn’t last. This year is going to be different though…it just has to be…for my own sanity.

I’m doing well so far. I have been a member for two years of the YMCA for about two years and before this year I think I went maybe 10 times total. In the new year, I’ve been going almost every day. I started out walking for 30 minutes and was just happy I could do that. Then I increased my speed and incline after a couple of weeks. I also hired a personal trainer…and this has made the world of difference for me. I didn’t know how to do any of the machines there and felt so self concious but with her there to help me every step of the way I am beginning to build my confidence.

I started off in the summer trying on my own to get into shape and lost some weight …then I hired the trainer and I have even lost more weight. I am down 22 lbs since June of 2007. This is all great, but I don’t feel happy….all I see is the amout left that I need to lose. Is that crazy or what? I’m 5′1″ and I should be about 100 lbs…I’m more then double that!

This past week has been stressful for me. I’ve been feeling fat, swollen, bloated and hot…I even thought to myself why bother with it…I just want to give up…and go back to my old ways. I didn’t though…but I felt like that.  That is why I am here. I need to have like minded friends to help me through these tough times and just listen to me vent and encourage me to go on. I am hoping to make some friends here and offer encouragement.